Whew, what a week I'm having! Thanks to WBIR-TV in Knoxville for hosting me on the "Style" program on Tuesday. This Big Girl had Big Fun, particularly presenting The Professor to the crew. The Professor is an extremely large chocolate bunny with that familiar, higher education, glazed-over look in his eyes...you remember from your college days...too many papers to grade, too many holes in that houndstooth blazer...too few hairs to comb over...

Can't wait to entertain my Knoxville fans on Monday 4/12 at the Dogwood Arts Festival Luncheon; let's review how hard I've worked on my speech...you gals better LAUGH! Plus I make reference to chocolate no less than fifteen times in a half-hour period, so that alone should keep it going.

Only 3 MORE DAYS until Lent is over and I can consume mass quantities of CHOCOLATE, Food of the Gods. And yes, I am a certifiable Goddess...Bunkie, Goddess of Appetites. Did you fall asleep in World History, or what?

Here is Bunkie's No Fail Food Plan for Easter Sunday:

7am: Hit the snooze button, grope for a Hershey Kiss on your nightstand, unwrap that sucker and pop it in your mouth. Chocolate-Denial Season is OVER!

8:00am: Bounce out of bed (or if your knees are presently without cartilage, as are mine, limp)
Tear into the Snickers Bar in your bathroom as you wait for the shower to warm.

8:30am: BREAKFAST! Warm up those croissants au chocolate you happened to throw in your grocery cart yesterday and pour yourself a gigantic glass of skim milk...gotta watch those calories!

9:00am: Church. God made chocolate, so He won't have a problem with you sneaking a few Kisses during the singing of the extremely loud hymns, because let's face it, on Easter, it's always "Alleluia" ten thousand times over and over, and even God gets a little irritated, ok?

10:15am: BRUNCH! In order to prevent diabetic shock, you should probably order some bacon and eggs, grab a little protein here. But do enjoy a latte with a shot of chocolate...gotta keep the momentum going!

11:30am: Back home and time for EASTER BASKETS! If your significant other has half a brain, he will have showered you with every type of chocolate imaginable, or at least a 3lb bag of Peanut M&Ms. You don't want to hurt his feelings...try every variety, NOW.

12:30pm: SNACK. I'm thinking a few more warmed-up chocolate croissants would do nicely...you know they just don't taste as good after the first 24 hours...time for a nap...where are those Kisses?

3:00pm: ROAD TRIP! What a beautiful Easter Day, what a great reason to go for a drive...to Baskin Robbins! I'll have a 2-scoop sundae with extra hot fudge, please. Thank you God, for spandex, amen.

5:00pm: DINNER. Am feeling a tad sickish, better drive through DQ for a big cheeseburger and some fries and an obscenely large Coke. What's that? The Peanut Buster Parfaits are on sale? I'm not sure...I just had ice cream 2 hours ago...oh, well, if it will save me $0.53 cents, go for it!

7:00pm: INTENSE NAUSEA AND STOMACH SPASMS. NO, IT'S NOT FROM ALL THE CHOCOLATE. I SWEAR THAT KID IN FRONT OF US AT CHURCH HAD A VIRUS!

8:00pm: Ahh, much better. In my jammies, all tucked into bed with a People magazine, a Coke, and of course, the rest of the Kisses. What a great Easter day! Tomorrow, I vow to only eat chocolate twice...per hour....Happy Easter!